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Nurse Reveals Top 5 Regrets of the Dying

Navy nurse with patient, 1940s

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Great article from the Eject Blog …make a New Years Resolution to change your life, focus on the important things and live with no regrets!

 

NURSE REVEALS TOP 5 REGRETS OF THE DYING

From Arise India Forum:

“For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. 

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

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Love this Version of the New Years Song!

True talent always inspires me! I can’t stop singing along with these two.  A great new version of the New Years Song with Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon Levitt!

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The Little Things

“It’s not the greatest things that make the show. It’s the little things that make the world go.” 

Don’t know who wrote this but I saw it on my uncle’s desk this morning! It’s such a great quote. It sounds like Dr. Seuss but I couldn’t find a source for the quote.

Nevertheless, it truly is the little things that matter most in life. Sometimes the little things do lead to great things but we must live life one step at a time. As we start a new year, let’s do a little thing each day to make our lives and the world better!

Keeping with the theme of this quote, here’s another one of my favorite inspiring songs, Lenka‘s “The Show“:

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Most Inspiring Song of 2011

I love music because when I am feeling down, the combination of words and melody makes me feel better. When I’m happy, great music just makes me more so.

What’s even better is when a simple tune expresses exactly what I’m feeling and provides answers to my burning questions of: “Am I the only one that feels this way?” AND “How should I solve the problems I’m facing in my life right now?”

This year the song that really stood out and inspired me when I needed to keep on going was Andy Grammer’s “Keep Your Head Up“.

My favorite thing about this song is it’s message: you have to keep on going even when times are hard. You will overcome this. Or, in Grammer’s words:

“This is just a journey/ Drop your worries/ You are gonna turn out fine.”

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What Women Want

 

Love Love Love

Image by Gregory Jordan via Flickr

We all want that “perfect” relationship. It’s true that no one is perfect but one thing we should never settle for is someone who does not treat us well. The most important thing to look for in a relationship is character because without good character everything else will fade in the long run.

Every girl wants her prince charming. Here’s what we want men:

“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep… wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you’re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have you…. The one who turns to his friends and says, ‘that’s her.’”

 

 

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Looking for Joy? Find It Here

An emoticon with a smile. For more emoticons i...

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Watch this simple and short movie on Joy. Beautiful pictures, calming music, and excellent quotes. Here’s the link:

Finding Joy Movie 

What is “joy”? Joy is when we feel happy because we are anticipating something good in the future. An example of this is the joy we feel when seeing a baby, especially if it’s our child.

This movie makes me feel happy and want to go out and do something great!

I hope it inspires you! Happy viewing!!

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Tips For Loving Yourself!

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This article is from Shape Magazine . I have it pasted up in my closet and look at it every morning.

I see so many women (and men too, although it’s less obvious with them) who don’t love their bodies. They look in the mirror and see their flaws. They don’t see how beautiful they are.

But our bodies are so amazing. We need to be grateful for what we have. Everyone has something that is beautiful about their body and they should be proud of it and own it.

Loving your body means eating healthy and exercising as well as positive affirmations. It doesn’t mean you are satisfied with everything or that you can’t better yourself. In fact, making your body more beautiful by dressing it in nice clothes and adorning it with makeup and jewelry (if you are a girl) and feeding it good, healthy food and taking care of it is part of loving it.

Your body is the vehicle for which you live your life. Drive carefully. And read these tips:

Life is short; why spend it bashing your body? If you need help jump-starting your self-acceptance, just read our list of reasons to embrace your body – from head to toe.


1.
 Because it’s unique; no one else has the same one
2. Because it’s capable of extraordinary feats, enabling you to run, climb, jump, lift, squat, snuggle, and spoon
3. Because no matter how badly you treat it, it’s willing to give you another chance
4. Because it’s expressive, telling you how it feels (pay attention!) and broadcasting to others how you feel about it
5. Because, let’s face it, confidence is pretty sexy
6. Because your daughter must learn to love hers
7. Because somebody out there (or many somebodies) admires, covets, and adores it
8. Because you’ll regret not loving it more later

Expert tip: Body confidence isn’t as elusive as you think. Developing it simply requires making small adjustments to your attitude every day. The key is to concentrate on something positive about yourself instead of fixating on your weight or perceived flaws. Ann Kearney-Cooke, author of Change Your Mind, Change Your Body (Atria) uses a golf score counter to tally the times she does something positive for her body. “If I eat fresh fruit,  I click it. If I go for a fast walk to blow off steam instead of diving into a bag of chips, I click it,” she says. “If I’ve accumulated 10 clicks by the end of the day, I’m happy.”

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A Wonderful Gift!

A mother holds up her child.

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This story just makes me want to say “awww….”

The holiday season is a time when lots of people focus on buying gifts. This is not a bad thing (especially if the gift is for me). But, I think, the true meaning of the holiday season is to realize that the biggest gift we have is the gift of each other.

One of the strongest bonds in our lives are the relationships we have with our parents and then, later our children. Family is such a great gift.

With that in mind, here is a holiday ode to mothers.:

A Newborn’s Conversation with God 

-Author Unknown

A baby asked God, “They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?”

God said, “Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you.” 

The child further inquired, “But tell me, here in heaven I don’t have to do anything but sing and smile to be happy.” God said, “Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your angel’s love and be very happy.” 

Again the child asked, “And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk to me if I don’t know the language?” God said, “Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak.”

And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?” God said, “Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray.” 

Who will protect me?” God said, “Your angel will defend you even if it means risking its life.”

But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore.” God said, “Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you.” 

At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked, “God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel’s name.”

God said, “You will simply call her, “Mom.”

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Success Depends on You….

Do It Anyway

by Mother Teresa

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.  Forgive them anyway.

Asking For Forgiveness

 If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.

English: Four hands holding.

 If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.  Succeed anyway.

SUCCESS (magazine)

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 If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.

Friendship, Göteborg, Sweden

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What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.  Create anyway.

Artists for Humanity. Artist in painting studio

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If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.  Be happy anyway.

Wedding hugs

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The good you do today, will often be forgotten.  Do good anyway.

English: BANGKOK (Oct. 26, 2011) Lt. j.g. Just...

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Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway.

English: Mother and child.

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In the final analysis, it is between you and God.  It was never between you and them anyway.

A man and a woman holding hands with fingers i...

Note: It is thought that this poem is based on a poem by the same name by Dr. Kent Keith.

The first time I saw Mother Teresa‘s poem “Do It Anyway”  I was visiting an office at my school. I can’t remember why I was there, who I was visiting, or what I was there for. The one thing I do remember is the poem on the wall. It was in a frame parallel to the desk.

I remember thinking that this is such a beautiful and aspiring message. I wish more people would read it and take it to heart.

I see so many times people being influenced negatively by other people. They quickly lose interest in things that will be beneficial to them because they dislike the people involved. Of course, things are nicer when you are popular and everyone loves you but that’s not why you should do anything in life.

You should do things because you are passionate about them and because they are the right things to do. Remember it doesn’t matter what anyone says. In the end they will come around. But first, you have to believe in yourself and the power you have to be the “change you wish to make in the world”.

I believe that no matter what your faith, this poem is an awesome mantra for living well and succeeding.

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Argument in Favor of Dating an Intelligent Women…..

English: Girl Reading a Wikpedia-Book from Ped...

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I think I’m in love. My friend posted this on facebook today and I think it’s genius. First off, how many poems or any anything are out there promoting intelligent and well-read women? Hardly none that I can think of. Secondly, I love the way the poem is crafted and the beautiful language it uses. I felt inspired after reading it. So inspired in fact that I tried to look up more about it on google and found that it was inspired by another poem on another blog which makes the same point in a different way and is from a man’s point of view. That poem is here: “You Should Date An Illiterate Girl”

So, you see, writers can get inspired by other writers to create something great. Perfect your craft by seeing what others are doing and building on that. You can do it. But before you do….read this:

A Girl You Should Date

Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.

Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag. She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she finds the book she wants. You see the weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a second hand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow.

She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.

Buy her another cup of coffee.
Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.

It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas and for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry, in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.

She has to give it a shot somehow.
Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who understand that all things will come to end. That you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.

If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.

You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.

You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.

Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.

Or better yet, date a girl who writes.

– Rosemarie Urquico –

from the blog: http://nonamerah.wordpress.com/2011/10/03/869/

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